A month has gone by since I have written a post. My energy has been knocked down and I lost a bit of my drive. I have been journaling my thoughts, although I do not know if they are blog material. I started this blog as a personal outlet, a place to lay my thoughts so they would not fester inside. Along the way, I lost my vision and started writing for others. I’m not sure why, it isn’t as though many people read or even follow my blog.
I have been compiling memories to paper with the hopes of writing a book about my journey. I want others to know what life is like for heart failure patients and for other patients to know they are not alone. If I help one patient with this blog or change one person’s mind to register as an organ donor, then I will have accomplished my goal.
Another goal is too fight through this relentless soul crushing fatigue. Since my heart can’t keep up with the demand of my body, the blood is diverted away from muscles and tissues in the limbs and is sent to vital organs instead. Because of this lack of circulation, everything is a monumental task…or feels as though it is. But, i am resilient. I am ready to continue my fight!
So…I will keep writing.